TUG buddy - I want your opinion

Wanna Talk about TUGs with your fellow members? Then you may do so here.
User avatar
Stef
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 120
Joined: 5 years ago
Location: Athens, Greece
Contact:

TUG buddy - I want your opinion

Post by Stef »

I just want your opinion about some thoughts of mine.

A few words about me; I'm 31 and i'm a straight male who loves bondage, but in the "non sexual" way; That means that i don't enjoy it as means of foreplay but as a standalone experience! I like watching photos and videos of women in bondage, the struggling, the helplessness... and sometimes, I desperately want to be in such predicaments!

I love to get bound and gagged every once in a while just for the pleasure of being powerless and helpless without expecting sex if that makes sense...!
I just have the typical kidnap/home invasion/caught snooping etc. fantasies in which I typically end up bound and so on.
I occasionally have those urges and most of the times I want to be the captive, but I also like the idea of being the captor, so i guess that makes me a switch.

Now, I stated that i'm straight because I wanted to share that I wouldn't care what gender is the person that does the tying, because the tying is what's important for me, and sometimes that person/people (in my fantasies) is/are male. To that extend, I'd definitely be ok having someone (male) for TUGs even though i'm straight, and i wouldn't mind tying him up. Of course I'd definitely prefer a woman/women in every instance.

I would even pay for having someone to tie me up when those urges occur...!

What do you think about all that?
Is it weird for a straight male to be more of a sub than a dom?
Is it weird for a straight male to get into male-to-male bondage?
Do you have similar thoughts?
Do you have someone to play with?

I wish i had someone for bondage games :/
Any volunteers? xD
Last edited by Stef 3 years ago, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar
TightsBound
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 592
Joined: 6 years ago
Location: CT, USA

Post by TightsBound »

You’re not weird at all. If you are, then we pretty much all are. 🤪

I consider myself a switch, meaning I love tying and being tied. I’m straight, but have no problem playing with other men, both as a dom and as a sub, and have played with men multiple times. There have even been some occasions that were rather adult. And yes, some of those past experiences sometimes recreate themselves in my fantasies.

So nope, you sound perfectly fine 😁
User avatar
captured_prize
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 674
Joined: 4 years ago
Location: Cleveland, Ohio

Post by captured_prize »

I'm a straight male myself, and I am definitely a sub. I just do self bondage, but I wouldn't mind if another guy tied me up and gagged me as long as he understood that I will not do anything sexual with him. If it's just bondage, then I tend to have a preference for a male captor.
Just your average crossdressing damsel in distress...

Check out my story here: https://tugstories.com/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=20583
Ropelover28nj

Post by Ropelover28nj »

Don't think its weird at all and actually feel the same exact way,you pretty much hit my disposition towards tie ups right on the head (though I will say if it was a female tying me up/getting tied up by me their would definitely be some sexual turn over) but I actually feel the exact same way,so if you are weird so are a bunch of us it seems 😄
Kyle
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 313
Joined: 5 years ago
Location: Southern US

Post by Kyle »

I'd agree to a large degree. My interest in bondage started young in a completely nonsexual way. When it comes to getting tied up in a scenario like that, I'm not so hung up on the sex of the person, or people, doing the tying. In a few more outlandish scenarios, I tend to think of male captors, especially in being forcibly overpowered and bound.

When it comes to tying someone up, though, I'm really only interested in tying up women. I'd much rather see a woman tied up than another man.

I don't think it's weird for men to want to submit. From what I've seen, most people who have an interest in it are on the submissive side. Men are more likely to want to be dominant than women. Dominant women seem to be somewhat rare. I'd say it's far less likely for a man to be okay with male-male bondage, because (so far as I can tell) most people see it as mostly or purely a sexual thing, and the vast majority of people are straight. Bondage as a kink or fetish is fairly common, but I don't really think most people are actually into it as more of a "game" apart from maybe the odd joke or funny experience here and there.

Maybe it would be better for a game to not be tied by a woman, so it's less likely to be sexual (for those of us who are straight).
Red86
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 683
Joined: 3 years ago
Location: Maryland, USA

Post by Red86 »

Nope, don't see it as weird. As a straight male myself, I have no problem with M/M bondage as long as it's kept non sexual. As far as with a female, the tying would still be the main focus & doesn't matter if it gets sexual or not. While I am partly switch, I do lean heavy dom. So I would say I agree and have mostly similar thoughts. It has been a while since I've had someone to play with. While I don't run around announcing it, if someone asks if me if I'm into bondage, I'll most likely tell them the truth.
User avatar
Gagged_Miko
Forum Contributer
Forum Contributer
Posts: 19
Joined: 3 years ago
Location: California

Post by Gagged_Miko »

there is nothing weird about that in this context. I like it in a "non-sexual" way just as I do in the very sexual way. For me, the situation does not even have to be sexual at all as long as someone is tied up and gagged, it gets me excited no matter what. In fact, it might even be better when the focus is non-sexual, but just the binding and gagging. I am not sure if that is the type of thing you meant, but I can relate in those ways.
Hojojutsutengu

Post by Hojojutsutengu »

Nothing weird at all about that.

I’m very much the same where for the most part I’m straight and enjoy being a Dom for the ladies but there’s something fun about being don’s by another guy or even tied with one.
User avatar
stormchaser1
Forum Contributer
Forum Contributer
Posts: 23
Joined: 6 years ago
Location: Columbia SC

Post by stormchaser1 »

Nothing weird about that.
I am about the same. I like getting tied up and just left to struggle. I enjoy bondage in a non sexual way also.
AlexanderBound
Forum Contributer
Forum Contributer
Posts: 15
Joined: 3 years ago
Location: USA

Post by AlexanderBound »

Don't feel weird about it in the slightest my friend!

I've always been interested in those things. Being tied up, watching those videos!
You're in the right place here :)
shyguy92
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 156
Joined: 6 years ago
Location: NW USA

Post by shyguy92 »

Seems like plenty of people have already thrown in variations on the same answer.

I, too, feel almost exactly the same ;)
User avatar
Stef
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 120
Joined: 5 years ago
Location: Athens, Greece
Contact:

Post by Stef »

It's such comforting that many of you have similar thoughts! Thanks!

I have another question for discussion... Do you always want bondage in some way, or does it come every now and then?

Let me elaborate; I do love bondage from any perspective (switch) , but it doesn't come very often as a desire... I'd say it's peaked every few months... The rest, i'm just a "normal" person. Nevertheless, when my desire reaches its peak, I really really want to be the sub to get pleasure!

All the other time, I'd like to be the dom/or nothing; vanilla sex works fine!

What about you? When do you have those bondage desires? Is it the weather? The mood? Stress? Do you live the bdsm lifestyle or you're a lot like me?
Ropelover28nj

Post by Ropelover28nj »

Stef wrote: 3 years ago It's such comforting that many of you have similar thoughts! Thanks!

I have another question for discussion... Do you always want bondage in some way, or does it come every now and then?

Let me elaborate; I do love bondage from any perspective (switch) , but it doesn't come very often as a desire... I'd say it's peaked every few months... The rest, i'm just a "normal" person. Nevertheless, when my desire reaches its peak, I really really want to be the sub to get pleasure!

All the other time, I'd like to be the dom/or nothing; vanilla sex works fine!

What about you? When do you have those bondage desires? Is it the weather? The mood? Stress? Do you live the bdsm lifestyle or you're a lot like me?
Well for me personally I think about it daily,thats why I come on here so much and try to chat with people 😄, I actually think that I need to work on not thinking about it as much cause I should be able to get off on the thought of normal sex, but ever since I discovered bondage as a fetish,pretty much all sexual fantasies revolve around it,though some things can definitely be vanilla.
Thats just me though
shyguy92
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 156
Joined: 6 years ago
Location: NW USA

Post by shyguy92 »

Stef wrote: 3 years ago It's such comforting that many of you have similar thoughts! Thanks!

I have another question for discussion... Do you always want bondage in some way, or does it come every now and then?

Let me elaborate; I do love bondage from any perspective (switch) , but it doesn't come very often as a desire... I'd say it's peaked every few months... The rest, i'm just a "normal" person. Nevertheless, when my desire reaches its peak, I really really want to be the sub to get pleasure!

All the other time, I'd like to be the dom/or nothing; vanilla sex works fine!

What about you? When do you have those bondage desires? Is it the weather? The mood? Stress? Do you live the bdsm lifestyle or you're a lot like me?
Mine comes and goes, I'd say. Can't always predict it, but I'd say stress is definitely part of it.

I bet it would come more frequently if I had a buddy also into it, though.
Ducttape1234
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 172
Joined: 5 years ago
Location: Illinois

Post by Ducttape1234 »

I'm a straight male as well who loves to be tied by anybody lol it's the helplessness that is fun for me. Its not weird at all. It's all in good fun. There are definitely specific situations where I'd prefer to be with a female, but those experiences are for more intimate circumstances as opposed to just being tied up for fun :)
I'll tie you if you tie me :D
Janus408989
Forum Contributer
Forum Contributer
Posts: 25
Joined: 3 years ago

Post by Janus408989 »

My friend, I don't think that there is anything weird about anything you said. In fact, it all sounded pretty normal to me and by the looks of it, many others too. One of the best things about this forum is the fact that you can be open about your fantasies and desires without any fear of being judged. What we feel is clearly natural so what society finds acceptable clearly can't be.

My fantasies are not actually a World away from your own, except maybe that mine do happen to be sexually driven. Just like you, I consider myself as a switch even though I lean significantly towards Dom than Sub. My preference of partner would also first and foremost, be a female but that certainly doesn't rule out the possibility of the fantasy partner being another male. In my opinion, our fantasies are fundamentally personal and unique to each of us. Experience has shown me that some fantasies are better left as fantasies... but just like you (and many others I'm sure) I always felt the irresistible urge to play out my fantasies in real life. This of course comes with many challenges. Paying for it is the first and seemingly easiest option which I explored many years ago. It wasn't immediately successful because you still have to explain exactly what you want to someone who may or may not understand it or be able to provide it....and even if they do, there is still that underlying feeling that it isn't real. That said, I would recommend that you give it a go and decide for yourself.

Ultimately, finding someone in the real World who is the perfect fit (or close enough to it) to play out your fantasies (and theirs) with, is a matter of luck. That said, it is far from impossible and you would be surprised at how many women (and men) out there harbour similar fantasies to your own. Maybe due to frustration, about 20 years ago I started to be more open with my sexual partners about what I liked and on some occasions, purely gambling on my instincts, I just went ahead and introduced them to bondage. Some said they liked it, some seemed to like it and a few genuinely did like it. The thing is, you will never know until you ask. I got very lucky. I met my current partner 12 years ago and one of the first things I did was tell her everything about me. Everything.....and like I said, I got lucky. 12 years lucky so far. Not perfect (she leans far more towards bondage Sub than Dom) but closer than I could ever have hoped for.

So whatever you do, don't lose faith. There are thousands of women (people) out there who would be more than happy to fulfil your fantasies because by doing so, they would also be fulfilling their own. And in that sense, gender becomes refreshingly irrelevant.

I write a lot of personalised role play stories for some of the female members on this forum but as yet, never for another male. And in all honesty, I can't think of any good reason why I wouldn't be open to the idea. Open offer, so feel free to drop me a private message. That said, the new rules of the forum regarding access to private messaging will probably prevent that for a while.....so I will send you my private email address so you have the option.

Either way, I really admire your openness and honesty.....and I wish you the best of luck.
User avatar
Stef
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 120
Joined: 5 years ago
Location: Athens, Greece
Contact:

Post by Stef »

A huge thanks for your elabore reply..! I'm speechless...

I hope you're right though because in real life, it's almost impossible to find like-minded people and that often causes some kind of dissapointment. Even harder when you live in a sexually-close-minded country like Greece. (In my opinion)

Erotic pleasure is health; health of the mind, and I sometimes feel cheated for having those fetishes and NOT fulfilling them because we're not getting younger and we only live once.
Janus408989
Forum Contributer
Forum Contributer
Posts: 25
Joined: 3 years ago

Post by Janus408989 »

Hi Stef,

I hear you and I empathise.

You are right. We only live once so my best advice would be, find a way. It is easy to feel that you are surrounded by a society who won't accept or understand your desires but in truth, that society is very likely littered with others who feel just like you do. Finding them is a challenge and can take time but in the meantime, and as I mentioned previously, you should consider paying a professional for what you want. You will need to take some care in finding the right one and you will need to bear in mind that it won't be as real as your would like. Even so, the experience will be better than doing nothing. Do your research, they are out there. The cost may well be relative to the quality of service but if you do find one, just make sure that you explain exactly what you want in detail before you take the plunge. If it doesn't turn out like you hoped, search again and keep doing so until you get want you want. Find a way......because....you do only live once.

Good luck :-)
User avatar
Silkenvixen
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 203
Joined: 6 years ago
Location: Western Pennsylvania
Contact:

Post by Silkenvixen »

Is it weird for a straight male to be more of a sub than a Dom? No, not at all! I'm one and I like being tied up and on the subbie side!

Is it weird for a straight male to get into male-to-male bondage? Nope! And there's nothing to be ashamed about if you and he get aroused, after all this is why you're doing it.

Do you have similar thoughts? Yes I do, sometimes when I'm crossdressed and other times when I'm just me as myself. In fact I have been tied up male-to-male at least once, tied by another male as myself, and had numerous fantasies including with an out of state friend of mine.

Do you have someone to play with? Not regularly, sadly he passed away last year. But I keep hoping.....you wouldn't be in western Pennsylvania, would you? ;)
User avatar
Stef
Centennial Club
Centennial Club
Posts: 120
Joined: 5 years ago
Location: Athens, Greece
Contact:

Post by Stef »

Nahh! In Greece unfortunately! :D
Post Reply Previous topicNext topic