Reflections on self-bondage + questions (M)

[BDBrit]

Hi, all, I hope this is the right section for this kind of post. I just wanted to share a few things I've found from my attempts at self-bondage. I've also got a few questions/reflections that some of you might be able to help me with.

1. The 'feeling' of being tied up
I don't know what rope 'should' feel like, but it's not how I expect. My approach at the moment is to tie my legs together and then cinch the rope in the middle. I can get it to be quite tight, but after a short while I just stop noticing that the rope is there. It could be that it has come ever so slightly loose, but I'm not so sure. Does anyone else find that you stop actively feeling the rope? I managed to get something resembling a hogtie on myself the other day, and - again - I didn't exactly 'feel' tied up, even when I tried to move. Is that just because I had done it to myself so I knew I could get free? Has anyone else found something similar?

2. What to do once tied up?
Another thing I find difficult is knowing what to do once I'm tied up. I don't live alone, so this is partly about ensuring that no-one overhears and/or discovers what I'm doing. However, struggling is only so interesting when you've done it to yourself. Beyond testing to see if the rope holds (I don't know how to tie a proper knot), there isn't much of a reason to struggle. Is it more interesting when someone else has tied you up? I feel the same way about gags. When I'm alone and there's no-one around, I don't see much point in trying to speak, which means I almost stop noticing that I'm gagged. Mind you, it was quite amusing to remember that the thing between my teeth was a ballgag (it's surprisingly comfy, I might add). I suppose I just get a bit bored once the challenge of actually tying myself up is done.

3. Is it possible to train yourself to fit more in your mouth?
I've always had quite a strong gag reflex, and can never fit a whole sock in my mouth. I've got my hands on some small pieces of gauze, which seem to do the trick nicely. I think I have become better at not gagging, but I'm also thinking in terms of how widely I can open my mouth. The ballgag I've got at the moment is just too small to feel like it holds my mouth open, but the bigger one I had was too big. Is it possible to gradually get used to bigger gags?

I think that's everything I wanted to share for now. I do have a couple of comments that are more 18+ in nature but I'll wait and see what people say first. It might just be that I need to find someone to tie me up so I can compare, or perhaps I would prefer to be tying someone else up. Thanks for reading my thoughts/ramblings. I'd be interested to see what others think.

[WillHBonney]

It’s been a while since I’ve done self bondage but I have had similar feelings to you at points even during non self bondage.

Regarding point 1, I found that self bondage never really scratched my itch because I was never truly helpless. That might be the reason why you don’t have that feeling of being tied up. Maybe you could look into bondage hypnosis that’s been mentioned before on this site.
Alternatively, you mention that you don’t know how to tie a proper knot. It might be worth learning that. You might feel the tie is a little more satisfying.

For point 2, I’ve had similar feelings even when not in self bondage. Last year my girlfriend tied me to a chair and left me alone, gagged and blindfolded (I wasn’t fully alone, she was in the room across the hall but I never knew that). After about 10 minutes of squirms and gagged moans the novelty of being tied up kinda wore off. I was essentially sat in a chair with nothing to do. It was kinda like being in a meeting in work I was there and couldn’t leave. But that was it.
However! the next time she did it she added some extra flair to the tie up that made it way more enjoyable when I was left alone. She added nipple clamps and also a sock over my nose. Both of these were pretty unpleasant and when she left me ‘alone’ I spent the entire time squirming and attempting to dislodge the unpleasantries.
I loved the feeling of “those clamps really hurt. I want to reach for them and remove them with my hands but I can’t!”
Maybe you could add your own ‘spice’ to the tie up. You could challenge yourself to see how long you can last in the tie up with some unpleasant additions before you need to free yourself?

[captured_prize]

I just do self bondage so I have plenty of experience with it.

For point 2, There's a couple of things I do. I'll either use the time I'm bound and gagged to relax or meditate. Being blindfolded helps in this endeavor. Focusing on other things or just letting the mind wander helps counteract the inevitable boredom that can occur when spending longer stretches of time in bondage.

Another thing I do is give some context to why I'm bound and gagged by acting out a scenario. My main fantasy is being kidnapped and held for ransom, so while placing myself in self bondage, I like to imagine it's my kidnappers doing it. After getting bound and gagged, I pretend my captors take a few pictures of me and contact my family with a ransom demand. Essentially, I act out the fantasy, struggling some and imagining what my captors are saying in the background.

Feel free to pm me if you want more advice or hear about my experiences. Putting all that here would make this post way too long!

[illest]

Lately I use randomization to spice things up a bit. I go to a certain roulette site and do random searches for scenarios. I don't even consider the extreme stuff or roulettes I particularly dislike but there's a couple of users who have roulette playlists focused around bondage that I use to select scenarios.

Some of my favorite roulettes have a lot of tie positions and gag options. A couple even has options for dress up. Usually not into dressing up but depending on my mental scenario it can help occasionally. After years of doing this thing I finally ordered a few actual bondage itens besides the household stuff. Namely a ball gag, ring gag, and a collar. Always wanted to see how these items in particular felt after seeing them so much in videos. I've actually found a new appreciation for ball gags now. Originally wasn't big on them but they feel kinda comfy and I understand why people who wear them drool so much.

[BDBrit]

Thanks [mention]WillHBonney[/mention] [mention]captured_prize[/mention] [mention]illest[/mention] for your thoughts and ideas. Firstly, it's a pleasure to speak to members I haven't spoken with before. Secondly, I'm glad I'm not the only one!

I might try putting on a podcast next time. Perhaps I should see it as an opportunity to relax a bit. Maybe I'm going about it the wrong way in thinking it should always be exciting.