Introducing my girlfriend to bondage

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operalove
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Introducing my girlfriend to bondage

Post by operalove »

Hi everyone,

I did a quick search and I am not sure if this topic was discussed before.
So I have been lurking on this forum for a while. I want to contribute more by sharing my tie up experiences but sadly I have none. I practice some selfbondage once in a while but my dream is to find a partner because I am more a dom than a sub and it seems this dream is about to be true.
I recently had a new girlfriend and we were separated due to the Covid situation but we are using this long distance relationship as a way to open up and know each other. When talking about sexual desires, I opened up to her about my fetish side and obsession with bondage. She was quite receptive and very willing to discover this together.
She is not familiar with bondage but open to be tied up in the bedroom. I don't want to scare her off and I slowly started explaining what attracts me. We are already building a strong connection of trust so she is not afraid of being submissive with me but still have some insecurities and it is completely normal. I didn't wanna bring up strict bondage with ropes, tapes, ball gags and learther gears.
I just told her we can start with soft sensual scarf ties, hands first and then we see how comfortable she might feel.
She feels uncomfortable about the idea of gags and blindfolds. I told her, we can start with simple scarf cleave gags and she said, maybe otm gags won't scare her much. I couldn't dive into more effective gags yet like stuffing and tapes...
So just talking about these makes her open to trust me and try.

Any one has more advice on how to introduce her gently and make her discover the pleasure of bondage?

For people who share their tieup games with their girlfriends or wives who don't really have attraction for it, how do you manage it?

Thank you for sharing!
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Tights tights tights
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Post by Tights tights tights »

This is a good sounding story you have posted. I have an alterego Facebook and instagram account to my proper every day self and on those I have interacted with many girls/women and talked about domination and bondage and they are more than open to the concept with them knowing what each other are into. But on my proper self sites, I have never brought myself to express what I am into.. nor have I ever expressed to girls/women who I have met in person my fetishes. I so envy you for meeting a girlfriend in person who you are slowly getting into the ups.
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operalove
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Post by operalove »

Thank you. Yes, I feel really lucky. It is just exciting to find the girl you click with, love and can really trust so much to share the deepest desires. I think when there is love and trust, a partner can be open enough to understand and curious to try.
Even though, with my ex-girlfriend we were quite open but it didn't work out great. I tried to open about my fetishes (I also have a fetish for gloves) she accepted wearing gloves but was not accepting the bondage thing at all... So I couldn't open up more about my bondage fantasies and it just died there.

Now I am telling almost everything to my current girlfriend, she is loving, very open and understanding, a little careful about the whole concept but trusts me and as long as it is not harmful, she would try anything. I just feel like the more she will feel safe with me, the more I can bring up more fantasies :)

I hope you find the right person! If she loves you and trusts you, you can just be yourself :D
operalove for my love of opera gloves. Nothing is more beautiful than tying up those silky hands and never forget a secure gag ;)
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Post by captured_prize »

Other than taking it slow (which is what you seem to be doing) there isn't much more advice I can give. Allow her to experiement a bit and figure out what she likes. I'm sure the two of you will find some common ground.

Btw, love your profile pic!
Just your average crossdressing damsel in distress...

Check out my story here: https://tugstories.com/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=20583
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operalove
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Post by operalove »

Indeed, we talk about the subject slowly and I bring up some new ideas. She gets more curious, like even proposing some positions to try and even questioning things, like the effectiveness of some gags :D
We are unfortunately still in different countries because of the COVID but I am really looking forward to the moment I get back and we experiment all this and find our common ground. Thanks !

And yeah, my profile pic is my ultimate bondage/fetish combination dream: boots, gloves and all tied up and gagged :lol:
operalove for my love of opera gloves. Nothing is more beautiful than tying up those silky hands and never forget a secure gag ;)
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RopemanSteve
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Post by RopemanSteve »

Sounds like you're doing really well on your own. Just keep talking, and answering each other's questions.
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operalove
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Post by operalove »

I wanted to give some update about how things evolved with my girlfriend.
We finally got reunited and just spent an amazing weekend together exploring our desires. It all went great.

So we were getting intimate and I asked her if she is ready to try some bondage and she was excited for it. She also told me, she might make noises and I'd better put a gag on her, that took my heart because I wasn't expecting it. I used a scarf gag with a knot between her teeth and told her to be more effective I added another OTM layer. She enjoyed muffled talks. I wanted to go slow so just tied her hands in front with a silk scarf and we started having fun.

I asked her later if I could tie her all up and she said ok, I added a scarf binding her ankles and another one over her knees. She was enjoying her self and moaning under the gag. I also enjoyed kissing her over the gag.
When we finished, I removed her gag and she told me, that she would be also interested to experience a blindfold, that surprised me again.
In our next session I tied her again in the same position and added a blindfold, she was so moaning.
I asked her how was the experience and she told me that she really liked it and enjoyed it!
She told me that she trusted me a lot and felt so safe. For fun, we were cuddling at the end and she trying to talk through the gag and me decrypting what she's saying. She was wondering if this type of gag was effective enough, I told her there is always better and I shoved a whole scarf in her mouth, she tried to talk and discovered how all her words and sounds were muffled.

I am glad she is enjoying this, maybe not in the same intensity I do but in a curious way where she wanna try things and I am sure our future sessions will be interesting :D
operalove for my love of opera gloves. Nothing is more beautiful than tying up those silky hands and never forget a secure gag ;)
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Post by Nexus »

Awesome news! Good for you! I’ve never had a significant other take so well to bondage, especially gag talk. You’re a lucky man!
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operalove
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Post by operalove »

Thanks! I have been waiting so long to get a partner like her. I am glad it finally happened. Hope you find the right person too :D
operalove for my love of opera gloves. Nothing is more beautiful than tying up those silky hands and never forget a secure gag ;)
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Post by Dreamerforever2004 »

Beautiful story.
I'm happy for.you.
If I may ask, and I'm not too curious, how did you meet each other, on line? Pub? A party?
And... I understood yuo are from two different Countries... wich ones?
Thanks in advance and continuing having a wonderful relationship.
😊😉
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operalove
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Post by operalove »

Thank you for your support and kindness.
This was already 3 years ago when COVID was messing up with traveling and borders control.
We actually both live in Japan. We first met online but didn't have the chance to date enough and then I traveled and was stuck outside of Japan for months. That's how the long distance relationship evolved, but we finally reunited and now we're living together :D
operalove for my love of opera gloves. Nothing is more beautiful than tying up those silky hands and never forget a secure gag ;)
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WAMGuy
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Post by WAMGuy »

Congratulations on everything!

If you don't mind my asking, have you managed to ramp up the intensity of the bondage?
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operalove
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Post by operalove »

Thank you!

Well, it is always about reaching the balance in the couple and compromising sometimes.
She got more open about trying more stuff like ropes, tape and leather cuffs and also different positions. But sometimes it does not make her comfortable or it gets a bit painful when it is too tight so I don't force her to be in situations she doesn't like.
And since she doesn't really love bondage itself the way I do, I always try to focus on pleasuring her too when she's helpless :D
operalove for my love of opera gloves. Nothing is more beautiful than tying up those silky hands and never forget a secure gag ;)
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