"Ughhhh, I'm like sooooo booored!"
"Yeah, like tell me about it"
"When is he going to get here?"
Identical twins Zoe and Chloe lounge in boredom on a very expensive couch, in a very large living room, in their mom's very large and expensive house. These college juniors have just returned home for spring break to find that their mom left for a trip with her new boy toy and didn't bother to bring them along! Now they're stranded in their home town alone with nothing to do, a fate worse than death for these social young women.
They were identical in nearly every way, same armpit length blond hair, same pretty face with the same green eyes and same bright smile, same high pitched valley girl accent which betrays their same very low IQs. Even now, their same short 5'1 toned sunkissed frames were wearing the same tight grey sports bras which push up their same perky c cups. Further down they had the same semi-defined six pack abs, honed from their many years of cheerleading and gymnastics, which leads into their same form hugging black yoga leggings. They also thought exactly the same way, they could basically finish each others...
"Sandwiches!" Screams out Zoe.
"Whaaat?" Says Chloe, dragging out syllables as she tends to do.
"I'm hungry and I want a sandwich, duh." Explains Zoe as if it were obvious
"Ughh, me tooooo. But we don't have time Zoe! He can be here any minute!" Chloe whines back.
This parallel thinking could come in handy sometimes, but thanks to their aformentioned low IQ, could also get them into some bad situations, like the one that they're in now. As you may have gathered these twin bimbos are waiting for someone. But who? So in their infinite boredom with a desire for excitement, they decided to put an anonymous tip on a local forum saying that their house was unlocked, unguarded and an amazing burglary target for any potential robbers. How they found this site is anyone's guess, but it seems that their plan was working out as their post received a single thumbs up emoji from "NotARobber99". The girls squealed and jumped for joy and got to work. After raiding their Mom's kitchen and hardware supplies, they went to work booby trapping the house. In every room, every stairwell, every door their laid a trap with the intention of ensnaring, disabling, or humiliating their expectant visitor. After finishing the last trap the girls collapse on the couch, checking the feed from their outside security cameras in excited anticipation. And that brings us to now, it's starting to get dark and their robber hasn't shown up yet.
"Where can he beeee!" Whines Zoe impatiently.
"Or she" Correct Chloe. "It's 2024, women can be robbers now!"
"Oh yeaaaaah" thinks Zoe.
"Girl power!" they shout together and giggle.
It's then they see it. A lone figure, dressed in a black hoodie and jeans sneaking his way across their front lawn towards their front door.
"OMGGGGG!" The girls shout in excited unison.
"Places everyone!" Chloe shouts to the only other person in the house.
The girls hustle over to shut off all the lights and stand in their foyer, about 10 feet from the front door. They giggle and shush each other in anticipation as the thief slowly turns the door handle, finding it unlocked like he was promised. He opens it it just enough so that he can slide in and then shuts the door behind him. He feels around for the light switch and flips it on.
"SURPRISE!!" Shouts the girls.
"AAAHHH" cries the unsupecting robber at the odd sight in front of him. Two very attractive and fit young women in skimpy yoga clothes were smiling and gesturing to their house as if they were some game show hostesses revealing a prize.
"Are you NotARobber?" Asks Zoe excitedly.
"Ummmm, no I am definitely a robber." Responds the robber, a pale 5'11 man in his early thirties, his chin sporting a patchy 5 o'clock shadow. "I think I might have the wrong house, I heard this one was empty."
"El Oh El. We lied." Squeaks Chloe with a quick shoulder shrug.
"Ok, well if it's just you two broads, the house might as well be empty," the robber laughs to himself.
"Heyyy, what's that supposed to mean?" asks Zoe as she and Chloe cross their arms.
"Yeah, that's really sexist mister robber" Chimes in Chloe. "You know I thought you could have been a woman, but not any more" Chloe and Zoe both cross their arms and cock their hips as if she said something insulting.
The robber's eyes back in forth between what he now knows to be two of the dumbest women he's ever had the misfortune of meeting "Ok, yeah whatever girls, let's just make this easy, why don't you two be good little girls and hop into that closet over there and wait for about 15 minutes. And then by the time you come out, I'll be long gone and no one has to get hurt. How does that sound?"
The girls look at each other and shrug with a dumb smile. "OK!"
The robber couldn't believe how easy this would be.
"But wait!" Says Zoe. "You need the key to our mom's safe."
"Oh yeahh, you need the key" Chimes in Chloe unnecessarily. "Oh, here it is!" Chloe pulls out a small key that was stuffed between her sports bra and the flesh of her breasts and extends it in front of her other hand rested on her cocked hip.
"Oh, well thank you girls" Says the robber as he takes a step towards the girls only for his shoe refusing to lift and him falling on his face.
The girls break out in a series of triumphant giggles. The robber raises his head to see them standing above him pointing and laughing.
"What the hell!" The robber looks towards his feet to see them securely stuck to the welcome mat he stepped on when he entered the door.
"Glue trap!!!!" Cheer the girls.
"You fell into our first booby trap!" Explains Zoe. "Super glue on the door mat!"
"And now your shoes are stuck to the mat! Chloe points and laughs.
"You fucking bitches!" Says the humiliated and angered robber as he starts to undo his shoe laces. "One last chance, give me the fucking key or you'll regret it."
"You can have the key" Says Zoe.
"Yeaaah, you just have to catch us first!" The girls both giggle as they scamper up the stairs.
The robber is able to remove both his shoes and looks down to see them both secured to the mat. He tugs on them but they won't come loose.
"Ohhhh mister robbeeeeer! Up here mister robbeeeer!" He lifts his head in anger to see the two brats taunting him from the top of the straight staircase, Chloe dangles the key between her thumb and index finger and then seductively slides it back down her sports bra givving it a light pat. She bends over and jiggling her buxom up and down at the robber and Zoe turns around and does the same with her tightly wrapped ass. "Come get us mister robbeeeeeer!"
Furious and embarrassed the robber starts moving his now socked feet towards the staircase.
"That's enough girls! Get over here now or you're going to regret it"
The girls cover their mouths in mock fear as he starts to ascend the staircase. He was so pissed that he failed to notice until halfway up the stairs that the girls had armed themselves with pillows. He only managed a confused grunt as the first one was launched directly into his face, causing him to brace against the wall. This was followed by another pillow, and then another. The robber had to shield his face as they kept pelting him with what felt like the heaviest and hardest pillows he's every felt. The girls were constantly squealing, giggling and taunting as he made his perilous climb to the top of the stairs.
"Pillow fight! Get him! You're sooo close!"
"Shut up!" The robber manages through gritted teeth and a hail of pillows.
He's making his way up but then slips on a pillow that was on a step and falls face first up the steps. He looks up to see himself only a couple steps away from his quarry. He also see the girls pulling something from off to the side to directly between them. It was a giant bean bag chair, probably double their size. The robber's eyes dart fro the chair to the grinning girls hands on their hips. The both raise their right hand and flap it in a bye bye motion.
"Bye bye mister robber" They smile as they simultaneously kick the beanbag down the stairs directly into their target's face.
He is pushed back with the great force of the incredibly heavy bean bag as it rolls over him and pushes him all the way back down the stairs, his entire body roughly bumping on each stair as it rolls down until he lies face up at the bottom of the stairs, his blurry vision barely making out the celebrating girls at the top of the stairs laughing and mocking his situation.
"Owwie! That looks like it hurt." Says Zoe in mock concern.
"Awww, you were sooooo clooose" Chloe mockingly encourages.
"We'll be in our room when you're feeling better!"
"Nooooooo Zoooooeeee, no boys allowed remember?"
"Oh right, you can't come into our room, no boys allowed! Sorry!"
The girls grab each other's waists as they strut away from the staircase and the robber hears a door shut.
The robber was hurt, but the adrenaline from his burning anger pushed him through the pain. He stood up dizzily, he worried that he had a concussion from his fall down the stairs. He starts to limp back up the stairs with no resistance.
"Where the fuck did you go!" The robber calls out between labored breaths as he reach the top of the stairs. I'm not playing around anymore, come out here now and give me the key or I swear you'll regret it!"
"In hereeeeee" the robber follows the grating pitchy voices to the room at the end of the hall where he throws open the door to see his two tormentors lounging on separate twin beds scrolling on their phones.
"Key! Now!" He gets out through gritted teeth. "Or I'll come in there myself and take it myself."
"You didn't say please" remarks Zoe without looking up from her phone.
"Yeah! And we like already told you that you can't come in" Chloe chimes in.
"Yeah, no boys" says Zoe still not looking up from her phone.
"That's it!" The robber takes his first step into the girl's room only to be met with multiple sharp pains along the sole of his foot. He immediately lifts his foot up in pain, hopping on his other foot. He turns his sole over to find nearly a dozen thumbtacks stuck into the sole of his foot. He looks around the bedroom to find that they were strewn all over the floor. He then starts experiencing the same sharp pains in his other foot, having hopped directly on a handful of pushpins. This shock causes him to lose his footing and he falls backwards in between the two beds onto a whole spread of tacks.
"Aiiigh!" The robber screams in pain as dozens of tacks bite through his sweatshirt and pants and into his hands, arms, legs, back and butt.
"We told you that you couldn't come in" Says Zoe with a shrug.
"Yeaaah, like someone needs to work on his listening skills" chides Chloe.
The robber continues to scream and writhe on the floor as the two girls, one at a time, step on his chest, using him as a bridge to walk over the tacks into the safety of the hallway.
"We'll be in the kitchen if you need us" Says Zoe as the girls leave.
The robber worked with hurried agony to pull the thumbtacks from his hands, arms and feet. But there were too many, eventually he just resorts to yanking off his socks, pants and sweatshirt, pulling out all the tacks with them. He stands up tack free, now only clad in his underwear and white undershirt, only adding to his humiliation. He'd try and put the rest of his clothes back on but it would take too long to pull all the tacks out.
He chased after the girls as fast as he could, which wasn't all that fast considering his wounded feet along with his caution for any other potential booby traps. He eventually makes his way back downstairs, passing his glued shoes still by the door. He briefly considered just cutting his losses and running out barefoot in his underwear back home, but his lust for revenge burned too bright to allow that. Instead he crept on towards the mocking giggles emanating from the kitchen.
He steps into the kitchen entryway to see the two women sitting on top of the kitchen counter sipping on wine glasses. They cover their smiling mouths in shock to see him only in his underwear and undershirt.
"OMG mister robber!" Laughs Zoe. "This is sooooo inappropriate!"
"Yeaah mister robber!" Chloe adds in. "We don't like you that way, you're waaaaaay too old for us."
"Yeah, way, waaaaaay too old."
The pained and enraged robber said no words. His anger towards the two airheads mocking and belittling overcame all his senses and he started to charge the women. This was short lived as after two steps he felt his foot hit a string which spanned across the kitchen. He hears a soft click to his left and turns his body to see a giant bag of flour swing from the ceiling, triggered by the tripwire, ram him directly in his face, exploding on impact covering him with flour. The heavy bag of flour feels like a shot from a professional boxer and the robber almost loses consciousness. He stumbles back until he lands in a swivel dining chair, which was perfectly set up to catch him when he fell. This triggered the next part of the trap which saw dozens upon dozens of eggs fall from the cabinet above him. They all cracked on impact, one after the other, dousing him with raw eggs which all stuck and congealed on his flour covered body.
"Gee mister robber" says Zoe, now standing in front of the robber, hands on her knees, bringing her eyes to his seated level. "You smell really good... but we'll have to save you for later. Oh Chloe!"
The robber then sees Chloe emerge from the pantry holding a giant roll of cling wrap.
"Let's wrap him up sis!" cheers Chloe as she struts up to the chair.
The beaten robber had no strength left to lift so much as a finger as the twins started wrapping his floured and egged body in the clingfoil. Chloe would hold the roll steady as Zoe spun the swivel chair around as fast as possible, securing his torso and arms to the chair's backrest with the sticky clear wrapping. After using up the entire roll the robber was now snuggly secured by a near unbreakable plastic wrapping, only leaving his legs and head free to thrash around.
"Woooooooo!" The girls cheer and jump around in front of their helpless captive.
"We win mister robber!" cheers Zoe.
"And you loooooose" says Chloe making an "L" on her forehead with her thumb and index finger.
"Loser, loser, loser." The girls chant dancing around the robber who was trying to divert his eyes from the girls' gyrating hips and waists out of utter shame.
"You're not a very good robber are you mister robber?" adds in Zoe.
"Yeaaah, you might want to change your name" laugh Chloe. "Oh, also!" She stops dancing to reach into her sports bra to pull out the key, and bends down to wave the key in front of his face. "This isn't even the key to the safe dummy!"
"Yeah our mom just keeps her safe unlocked all the time!" remarks Zoe. "You could have just ignored us and gone right to the safe."
"Ha ha! We outsmarted you!" Chloe tilts her head laughing in his face.
This humiliation was the last straw for the robber as tears start coming down his face, adding to the mess of flour and eggs.
"OMG, now he's crying" Zoe points out.
"No waaaaay! What a baby! It's just a game mister robber, don't cry just because you lost!" lectures Chloe.
"Yeah don't be a sore loser"
"Game?" asks the robber through his tears. "This is just a game to you? You hurt me, humiliate me and you call it a game!"
The twins look at each other in confusion. "Yeah, duh!"
"We like play these games all the time with people" Explains Zoe.
"How often do robbers come to your house?" Asks the robber in disbelief.
"It's not just robbers stupid" responds Chloe. "Pizza delivery boys, tinder dates, professors. Whoever we can get to play with us."
"Yeah, it's a really easy game if you're not stupid, we win if we get you and you win if you can avoid us." Says Zoe. "It's like a more fun tag."
"Wait so does that mean you'll let me go, You won't call the cops"
"Yeah like no duh!" Zoe rolls here eyes.
"Like how stupid is this guy?"
"Ok, fine, you win, just let me go please."
"Not yet silly!" Zoe ruffles his hair.
"Just sooooo dumb" remarks Chloe. "You have to earn it first"
"Yeah, starts Zoe. "Like our professors give us A's and we let them go, the pizza boys give us free pizza, most of the tinder guys just give us all their money."
"But I don't have any money. That's why I was trying to rob you."
"Oh" the sisters turn to each other. "Give us some time to chat" says Zoe as she and Chloe start to wheel the chair towards the open pantry door.
"Hey don't put me in there! Let's just talk ahmmmmmph." His sentence interrupted as Chloes jams a large dish towel in his mouth.
"Just shuuuut uuuuup already" Chloe rolls her eyes. "We'll come get you in a little bit you big baby."
Both women exit the cramped closet and shut the door, leaving their captive in the dark. He was stuck in there for at least 20 minutes before he was blinded by the door reopening and the girls wheeling him back out. They both looked very excited.
"Ok! I think we have a very fun plan!" Says Zoe.
"Yeah!" affirms Chloe.
"So we're really bored here because our mom left us all alone" Zoe further explains.
"So you're going to keep us company and do whatever we say!" says Chloe excited.
"Yeah! Anything we want you to do you'll have to do it too!"
"It's like you'll be our butler!"
"So what do you say!"
The man's eyes dart between them, he tries to speak into his dish towel gag which is still crammed into his mouth.
"Oh sorry" Chloe pulls the gag out of his mouth.
"It sounds like I'll just be your slave!"
"Noooo silly" Zoe shakes her head. "Butler, not slave!"
"And for how long?"
"Just for a week!" Says Chloe excitedly.
"A week!"
"Yep! What do you say?"
"Do I have a choice?"
The twins look at each other and quickly turn back to their captive, smiling sweetly.
"No!"
And thus ends the story of how the two twins Zoe and Chloe cured their boredom. The week was nothing short of hell for poor mister robber, now renamed to mister butler by the ever creative girls. He would walk around the house, ankles and wrists loosely cuffed in a skimpy maid outfit they found in their mother's closet, waiting hand and foot on perhaps the brattiest young women to ever grace the earth. Even so much as pouring their own wine glasses would be too much work for these pampered princesses. There were some parts he begrudgingly enjoyed, like rubbing sunscreen on to their tight bikini clad bodies for when they sunbathed, or being their water bottle holders for morning yoga. But it was mostly seven long days of their grating high pitched valley girls accents asking ridiculous and often humiliating tasks of him. Then finally came the day of his emancipation. The twins were just about to unlock his cuffs when suddenly the door opened.
"Mom!" The girls cried in unison.
In walked the girl's mother, just as well toned, same hair, same height, but a good 20 or so years older, but some tasteful botox and a less tasteful boob job made her seem much younger.
"My my girls, you've been busy."
"Yeah that's mister butler, he's our..." Starts Zoe.
"Let me guess? Butler?" her mother finishes.
"Yeah! How'd you know!" Chloe says in disbelief.
"It's the family smarts" she winks at the man.
"Yeah well, we agreed we'd let him go now." Explains Zoe with a twinge of sadness.
"Oh it's ok girls, I've got it, I'll let your butler go, but you should both leave so you don't miss your train back to school!"
"Thanks mom!" The girls say in unison. "Bye mister butler!" the girls say together both landing a small peck on each side of his cheek before running out the door.
The older woman slowly turns to the still bound butler with a smirk.
"P..p..please ma'am, I just want to go home..." The man is on the verge of tears.
"Shh, shh, shh" The woman holds a single finger to his mouth to shush him. "Listen honey, I don't care who you are and I don't care what you want. All I care about is that's a beautiful day and momma needs some sun. Grab the lotion and meet me outside, I don't think you'll be leaving this house for a long, long time.
Twins Home Alone (FF/M)
Not exactly how the story turns out, but this is what I imagined the charcaters to look like.
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harveygasson
- Millennial Club
- Posts: 1392
- Joined: 6 years ago
Definitely an interesting take on the home invasion plot theme