“The Amazing Wanda” in Put Your Jacket On and Stay Awhile (Competed!)(m/f)

[TamatoaShiny123]

(Note: the characters (minus Ernesto) are owned by [mention]Stiletto Amore[/mention]. I was given permission to write this by her.)

“The Amazing Wanda” aka Samantha was a master of stage magic (card tricks, pulling rabbits out of hats, etc.) However, What she was most famous for, however, was her escape artistry. Ropes seemed to slide right off her, gags couldn’t silence her no matter how tightly tied they were tied and she seemed that she had x-ray vision through blindfolds. Everyone seemed to love her. Well, all except for one.

And his name was Ernesto Ramone.

Ernesto was a very talented singer. He had this ridiculous vocal range and he seemed so passionate about his craft. He had such suave and had a voice that sounds like the personification of dark chocolate. He always gave 110% when in came to performing and people loved him for this.

Now, it’s not like he hated Sam. He liked her act and kinda found her to be pretty (not that he’d admit to that.) Unfortunately for Sam, she got in the way of the other thing that Ernesto was passionate about besides his voice: a paycheck.

He was supposed to sing at little Eric’s 10th birthday party, being held at the town’s banquet hall. He had prepared the perfect songs for the party, from the Pokémon theme song to Gaston to Despacito. Sadly for those who wanted to hear him sing a theme song from 20 years ago, Eric’s mother, Mary, heard from several other parents about Sam’s amazing work at Nicky’s birthday party several days ago, especially the miraculous “Firing Squad” illusion. She called Sam’s agent (aka Sam’s mom) and long story short, Ernesto received an infuriating phone call.

“I’m sorry Ernesto,” Mary told him on the phone “but I feel that Eric will enjoy Sam more. Besides, I can only afford one act for the party. I hope you understand.”
“Of course I do, Mrs. Cartier!” Ernesto said, surprisingly okay with the situation. “If it’s what Eric will prefer, then I guess I can’t argue. Perhaps next time.”
“Definitely next time.” Mary said before hanging up. ”that Ernesto Boy is quite understanding” she thought to herself.

What she didn’t know was that on the other side of the phone line, Ernesto was far from understanding. He was fuming.

TBC.

[Driverman]

Intriguing start, I am curious to see if Ernesto goes the "make her look bad at the party" route or "kidnap her to get her out of the way so I get the gig" route. Or something completely different. Can't wait to find out!

[Deleted User 769]

As the titular heroine of this little tale, I have to admit to being more than a little curious myself,..

[TamatoaShiny123]

Chapter 2:

Ernesto Ramone, usually calm, cool and collected, was fuming. As previously stated, it wasn’t that he hated the female Houdini. It was that she stole HIS paycheck. And NO ONE steals a paycheck from Ernesto R. Ramone!

“Oh, Hám,” Ernesto said to his hamster, Hám, “I’m so angry!”
“Squeak”
“I’ll tell you why!” He shouted as he threw himself on his bed. “That stupid Sam girl stole my gig at Eric’s party!”
“Squeak”
“What’s wrong with that? Now, that’s less money I’m making!”
“Squeak”
“Yes, while it’s only one gig, it’ll soon be a lot less money I’m making.”
“Squeak”
“Because if all those parents see her awesomeness on display, they’ll book her over me. And I won’t be able to buy the necessities of life!”
“Squeak”
“What are they? You know what they are. Voice lessons, cookies, Archie Comics, my subscription to Netflix. All of those could be gone soon if her popularity keeps rising.”
“Squeak Squeak”
“You’re right. I need to nip this in the bud. But how?”
“Squeak”
“No, I’ll never be able to get all those live chickens on such short notice.”
“Squeak”
“Nah. She stopped returning my calls after the ‘Carmella Cabello’ incident.”
“Squeak Squeak”
“Oh, Camilla Cabello... meh, close enough. But no! This has to keep her away from the show so that I can steal the spotlight and make sure that I’m the most popular act!”
“Squeak Squeak Squeaker”
“Hám! Language!”
“Squeak Squeak”
“Oh. Sorry, thought you said something else. But your idea...it’s dirty, underhanded and shameful...but since I don’t feel like thinking of anything else, we’ll go with your idea!”
“Squeak”
“That’s right, Hám. We will be seeing just how good of an escape artist she is. Muhahahaha! Muhahahahahahahaha! MUHAHAHAHAHA-*cough* *cough*. Ok wow. I need a drink.”
__________________________________________________

It was Saturday, the day of the party. Sam, wearing a long-sleeved white buttoned-up blouse, dark blue jeans and a purple bandana headband, was walking in the banquet’s hallway.

”Okay, so after the magic cabinet,” Sam thought to herself, we’ll do the grand escape. The birthday boy will be tying me up. The ropework should be simple: wrists, ankles, knees. The gag will probably be my headband tied over my mouth. Should I let him blindfold me? His mom has a scarf on, so-“

Her thoughts were interrupted by a hand suddenly covering her mouth and she was dragged into the janitor’s closet.

TBC

[Deleted User 769]

"Hel-mph!"

[TamatoaShiny123]

Chapter 3:

Ernesto believed that capturing Sam and immobilizing her would be easy. After all, he’s a strong man with biceps. He figured that he could use his strength to win over Sam.

Unfortunately for him, he didn’t know that Sam was multi-talented. Specifically, she was the captain of the school hockey team. Using her strength, she was able to throw her attacker to the floor.

“Oww!” Ernesto cried as he landed on his buttocks. “Son of a Bisharp! That hurt!”
Sam got a good look at her assailant. “Hey, I know you. You’re that singing guy.”
“‘Singing guy’?! I’m Ernesto R. Ramone, the greatest singer of all time!”
“Geez, ego much?”
“Said ‘The AMAZING Wanda’.”
“Touché. Why am I here?”
“I’m here to prevent you from showing up at this party!”
“And how are you gonna do that?” Sam asked with a smirk, “tie me, Sam O. Ward, up? That’s like trapping a lumberjack in a log cabin!”
“Actually, yes,” he said to her surprise. “I bet that I can keep you trapped here by using only materials found in this closet. What do you say?”
“No way. I’m here to perform for Eric, not for you!”
“What’s wrong, amiga?” Ernesto asked. “Is ‘The Amazing Wanda’ not as amazing as she claims?”
“It’s not that-“
“Of course not. It’s that you are a chicken. Bawk bawk bawk.”
“I’m not a chicken. I’m-“
“Bawk bawk bawk.”
“Quit it.”
“Bawk bawk ”
”Ohmygosh this guy is annoying. You know what, there’s probably only tape, rope and rags in here. Nothing too hard to escape from. Besides, it’ll make him quit the Heihei impression.” “know what, Ernesto? You’re on! Do your worst!”
“Yes! Now, let’s find something that’ll keep you here.” Ernesto walked to the closet in the back of the room and opened it up.

What did he find? Well, let’s just say that what Ernesto lacks in strength, he makes up for in his cunningness.

(TBC with a plan so brilliant, Ernesto will be given a scholarship to Oxford immediately after the story’s conclusion.)

[Deleted User 769]

"What have you got planned for me you unconsionanable brute?"

[TamatoaShiny123]

Chapter 4:

He opened the janitors closet and pulled out...a straitjacket?!

“Hey, a straitjacket. How convenient, eh?”

Ernesto had tried to sound shocked by this discovery, but it was clear to Sam that he was a better singer than he was an actor. “Don’t give me that bull! You placed that there to put me in it!”
“*sputter* What? Pfft, no! Never!”
“Save the lying for your fanbase, Ernesto! You stashed that in here before dragging me in here.”
“Even if I did, which I didn’t, where would I even find this?”
“The internet.”
“Please, chica. We all know that the internet is used for dog videos and buying poultry and reading stories about constables in distress, not buying garments found in insane asylums.”
“I’m not doing this. And you can’t make me.”
“Sam Ward, you will get in this restraint or else!”
“Or else what?” Sam asked, crossing her arms and smirking.
“Or else I will make chicken noises again. Bawk Bawk Baw-“
“Ok fine, I’ll do it. Just shut up!”

Five minutes later, Sam found herself wearing a quite restrictive jacket. Her arms were passed through the chest loop, keeping them still. The crotch strap prevented her from slipping the jacket over her head. And each strap was meticulously checked to make sure that the jacket stayed on no matter how much Sam struggled.

“I’m gonna have you sit down so that I can bind your legs.” Ernesto told her. “Do you want help down?”
“Sure” Sam relpied before sarcastically adding, “my hero.”

Sam was gently eased down to the floor. The singer grabbed a roll of duct tape from the closet and wrapped it several times around her ankles and then her knees.

When he was done, he asked her, “So, Ms. Houdini, think you can escape?”
“Sure I can. They don’t call me ‘The Amazing Wanda’ for nothing!” Sam told him, although she wasn’t as confident as usual.

He seemed to notice this in her voice, as he said, “Really? Because it doesn’t sound that way.”
“You kidding? I’ve escaped from far worse.”
“Sure you have. And I’m Beyoncé.”
“Oh, you mean a singer that has way more talent than you?”

This comment seemed to infuriate the singer. “Very cute, Sam. I think that it’s time to shut you up.” Ernesto untied Sam’s bandana headband, purposely messing up her hair in the process.”
“Hey! I spent 20 minutes combing my hair today, you brute!” Sam pouted.
“Are those your last words?”
“No. I have six last words.”
“And they are?”
“‘Ernesto sings like a dying cat.’”

Grunting, Ernesto came behind Sam and worked the cloth between her teeth. He pulled it increasingly tight. By the time he was done, Sam found that she could no longer touch her lips together.

“Ust ooo eight, Ereho! I ill ethape und buhfawm fah thuse pehpull!” (Just you wait, Ernesto! I will escape and perform for those people!)
Ernesto just laughed. “I have no idea what you just said. I’m guessing it was something derogatory about me,” (It wasn’t, but Sam was thinking some quite derogatory thoughts about him as he spoke) “but I don’t care. And, I guess that while you’re indisposed of, I guess that someone will have to perform for those people.”
“Ooh irk!” (You jerk)
Ernesto laughed again, having not understood what she said again (and if he did, he didn’t care). “Sorry, Samantha. But the show must go on.”

With that, he closed the door, leaving Sam to struggle.

TBC.

[Solarbeast]

Interesting continuation. I can’t wait to read the next chapter to see if she will escape the situation and how she will do it.

[TamatoaShiny123]

Chapter 5:

It was official, Sam O. Ward was stuck. The canvas contraption was way too tight for her to free herself from and the gag wasn’t coming lose, no matter how much she maneuvered her jaw. It looked like she wouldn’t escape this time.

Or would she?

You see, as cunning as Ernesto was, he forgot to disarm Sam of one important thing: her phone. Sam soon realized this and started her newest escape plan.

Fiest, she shook around until her phone fell out of her pocket. Next, she slid off her shoes and pulled off her socks using her toes. She typed in the password using her toes and went to her phone contacts. She called her best friend, Emily and put her on speaker.

“Hi Sam. What’s up?”
“Elp me Emuhly!”
“Sam? What’s wrong?”
“Um eyed up.”
“Tied up? Again? Sam, this is the third time this month! And are you gagged?”
“Uh-huh.”
“(Laughs) Okay sweetie, where are you?”
“Um en da anklet all en da anitah’ laset.”
“Anklet ball in the animator’s lasagne?”
“Nuh!”
“Banquet hall?”
“Uh-huh,”
“Janitor’s closet?”
“Uh-huh. Um airing a sraithackit!”
“What?”
“S-rait ack-it.”
“Oh, straitjacket. I get it.”
“Ya.”
“You know, I love our games of 20 questions.”
“Uht up!”
“‘Shut up’? You know what, I’m offended. Good luck getting out by yourself, Sam.”
“Nuuh!”
“(Laughs) I’m kidding, I’m kidding! Man, you always fall for my ‘I’m not gonna rescue you’ routine. I’ve done this twenty times! You’re so gullible!”
“Nut funny!”
“Look, I’m leaving right now to rescue you right now. Be there in 20 minutes.”

20 minutes later, the closet door opens, revealing Emily (wearing a grey Guns and Roses T-shirt and ripped blue jeans), who couldn’t help but giggle at Sam’s plight.

“I’ve never seen you wear a straitjacket before, Sam. You look good in it” Emily said as she untied Sam’s gag.
“Thanks. I think it really brings out my eyes.” Sam sarcastically replied.
“So how did you get into this mess?” Emily asked.

After Sam told Emily of Ernesto’s treachery, Emily said, “Well, his plan worked. When I came in, I heard him singing ‘Despactio’.”
“Is it any good?”
“I’d give it a 7 out of 10.”
“Well, I’m here to put his sinister singing to rest. I just need my magician outfit that I put in one of the other rooms. Hey, by any chance did you-“
“Yep. I figured that your headband would be used to shut you up. So...” With that, Emily pulled out a red bandana out of her pocket. “I got you this. Try not to get gagged with this one, it’s my favorite.”
“You’re the best Emily! Now, let’s go ruin that vile villain’s vocal performance!”
“Yea, let’s go!”
“Emily, before we go, can I ask you for something?”
“Of course! What is it?”
“Can you untie me?”

TBC

[Solarbeast]

Again another interesting continuation. I can't wait to read what happens next and I hope that the new found item, the straight jacket, will be involved in more of The Amazing Wanda stories.

[TamatoaShiny123]

After freeing herself from the straitjacket (and by ‘freeing herself’, I mean that Emily freed her, but what Ernesto doesn’t know can’t hurt his ego), Sam changed into her magician outfit (a white tuxedo coat, black bow tie, matching waist coat with the red bandana that Emily gave her acting as the pocket square, black fishnet stockings and black thigh-high boots; picture a goth Zantana on a budget) and raced towards the main hall where Ernesto was performing. As they prepared to storm his performance, they heard him singing:

Remember me! Though I have to say goodbye
Remember me! Don’t let it make you cry
For even though I’m far away, I hold you in my heart
I sing a secret song to to you each night we are apart
Remember me, though I have to travel far
Remember me! Each time you hear a sad guitar!
Know that I’m with you the only way that I can be!
Until your in my arms agaaaaaaaaaaaaain!
Re-

“Forget you, Ernesto!”

Everyone gasped and turned to see the female magician standing at the entrance glaring and pointing at Ernesto, who looked like a snake at a mongoose convention.

“Sam? What are you doing here?” Mary asked. “Ernesto said that you had to cancel due to ‘a broken flatula’.”
“First, ma’am, that’s not a real bone. He just combined the words ‘flatulence’ and ‘spatula’. Second, I’m here to reclaim my performance, you corrupt chorister.”
“Sorry chica. But these people love me. Isn’t that right?” He asked the child-filled audience. They cheered.

”Curses! He already got to the kids! Why must kids love Disney songs so much? But I can still win them over. she thought to herself. She ran onto the stage, hip checked Ernesto away from the mic and said into the microphone, “Hey kids! Who wants to see a magic trick?”

The kids cheered. Ernesto ran to grab the mic, but Sam used his momentum against him and sent him tumbling across the stage, sending the kids into an uproar of laughter. Sam continued by saying, “I’m going to be tied up with a bunch of rope and I’ll escape! Wanna see that, kids?” The kids cheered.

Ernesto, angry at his bruised butt (from his tumble) and bruised ego (from the kids laughing at him), grabbed the mic from her hands and said, “You know what, I’d love to see that too. In fact, I want to be the one to tie you up. Is that cool with you?”
Sam thought for a moment. ”hmm, well, it’s not like he can bust out the straitjacket with the kids watching him. He’d only be able to use the rope that I have.” “Know what? You’re on!”
“Great! But I have one stipulation.”
“What is it? If I lose, I have to listen to your Soundcloud album?”
“Good idea, but no. If you can’t escape, you have to retire...forever!”

TBC

[Solarbeast]

Interesting continuation. I can't wait to read what happens next and where the seeming finale will take us.

[Deleted User 769]

'The Amazing Wanda' is Jessica Fletcher in, "Excitement, She Wrote!"

[TamatoaShiny123]

Sam thought for a moment. She could easily free herself from ropes. She did it for a living, for Pete's sake! She never lost an escape challenge (except for that one time where Ernesto put her in a straitjacket, but Ernesto doesn't know about Emily's assistance). She could escape from ropes while blindfolded and gagged. Heck, if she was tied up with ropes and tossed underwater, the only thing that would trouble her was how to dry her hair afterwards (she was saving up to buy a hair dryer). But if she lost...nah, that could never happen. She's The Amazing Wanda!

"Ernesto, you got a de-"

Before she could finish her sentence, Emily placed her hand over her friend's mouth and dragged her over to the corner for a little chat.

"What the heck, Emily? Now YOU'RE handgagging me?"
"Focus, Sam! Do you know what you're agreeing to? If you lose, your escaping career is over!"
"Please, Emily, I got this."
"Are you sure about that? You don't have the best track record when it comes to bets."
"Yes I do."
"No you don't. Just last month, you bet your parents that if France won the World Cup, you'd do all your chores for a week without allowance and while wearing a gag so that they didn't have to hear you complain. And who had to clean the bathroom with a scarf between their teeth?"
"This is different! This time, I have control, unlike those sinister soccer players. And here, I don't have to clean a latrine. So, if you'll excuse me, I have a challenge to accept."

Emily threw up her hands and said, "hey, your funeral" and stepped to the side, letting her friend retake the stage.

"You're on! Although, you never said what happens if you lose."
Ernesto though. "You see, I don't plan on losing this. But if I lose...I don't know, I'll give everyone here candy!" (The kids heavily cheered for this.)

Mary brought a chair onto the stage and Sam sat down. Ernesto was about to decide on what to do when Eric ran onto the stage.

"Mr. Ernesto! Mr. Ernesto!"
"What, chico?"
"I wanted to use these on Ms. Wanda, but if you're gonna do this, I think you should use these." Eric said as he handed Ernesto an object that caused Sam to gasp. An object that reminded Sam of the end of the World Cup game. "Uh-oh. I didn't think this through" Sam thought as she gazed upon the object that had the potential to bring Sam's career to a abrupt end.

That object? Handcuffs.

TBC

[TamatoaShiny123]

”What? Handcuffs? Why does this kid have handcuffs?”

Now, it’s not like she hasn’t worked with handcuffs before. She has escaped from them before, but they were always gimmicked. They always had some secret button that she could press that would unlock the cuffs. But these looked to be real handcuffs that had no way out except for the key.

“Put your hands behind your back, please?” Ernesto requested with relish in his voice.

When Sam begrudgingly did so, he snapped them into place. The click of the cuffs being locked seemed to send chills down Sam’s spine. She moved her wrists around and felt around for a secret button, but no dice. This confirmed, much to her dismay, that these were real. Meanwhile, Ernesto had placed the key to freedom inside her left boot, making sure that there no easy way to access them.

Next, Ernesto grabbed the rope that Sam originally thought would be the main binding material and used it for Sam’s legs. He wrapped her from her ankles to her knees with just one piece. When he was done, she looked kinda like Ariel. (That is, if Ariel had her tail made of rope.) Then, he wrapped another piece of rope around her shoulders, holding them to the back of the chair.

“And done!” He exclaimed.
This surprised Sam. “Um, I know this is like telling the executioner to remember his axe, but are you sure that you don’t wanna do anymore to me?”
“Nah. Why bother? You’ll never escape the handcuffs. Anything else would be overkill.”

This statement was both good and bad news for Sam. If she escaped the cuffs, the rest of the ropes would be a breeze to escape from. But that was a big “if”. With the key in her boot, there was no plausible way for her to reach them. Would this really be her final act?

Still, she refused to show fear, especially to Ernesto. “Very well then. Are you gonna at least gag me?”
He shrugged. “Might as well. Your dialogue is kinda annoying, tbh.”
“Alright then. You can use my pocket square to do so.” He nodded and pulled out the bandana...which was tied to another one...and another one...and another one.

Despite her nervous state, she couldn’t help but smile by his growing frustration of trying to find the end of the bandana rope. And the kids loved it too. At least if this was the end, she performed one last trick.

10 bandanas later, Ernesto finally found the end of the rope. He took off the last two (one red and one black) and decided on how to silence the magician. He shoved the black one in Sam’s mouth and tied the red one over her mouth. She made some “mmph” noises to test out the gag, which seemed to amuse the kids.

“Ok, ‘The Amazing Wanda’.Let’s see how ‘amazing’ you truly are. You may-“
“Wait!” Emily exclaimed as she ran up on the stage. “Before she starts, is it cool if I offer her some last second encouragement?” She asked Ernesto.
He rolled her eyes. “Ugh fine.”
Emily came behind the chair and held Sam’s hand as she said, “Don’t worry, Sam-I mean Wanda. You’re gonna do great. Prove this idiot singer that you’re the greatest.” Sam nodded and mumbled something, possibly a “thank you”.

As Emily left the stage, Ernesto said, “Okay that was sweet...but not really. Sam...or Wanda...or Cosmo, whatever, you may start” he told her as he left the stage and started walking out the door.

“You’re not gonna watch?” Emily asked him.
He shook his head. “Nah. I know for a fact that she can’t escape without the key. Besides, I saw that there’s a platter of chicken tenders in the other hall. So, if you’ll excuse me...” he said before taking his leave.

Now, this may be hard to believe, but Emily’s hand-holding and kind words really helped Sam. In fact, Sam knew that the actions just performed by Emily would help her break free!

To be Concluded

[TamatoaShiny123]

Except for that she didn’t.

She tried her darndest, but with the key outta reach, there was no way to escape. As per the stipulation, she retired from stage magic and escape artistry forever. Never quite the same afterwards, she now lives alone with two cats.

The end



I’m kidding! That’s not how it ends!


She lives alone with three cats.

The end

[TamatoaShiny123]

OK, here’s the real ending:

Sam took a deep breath and started to attack the lock. Pointless without the key, you say? It may seem like that...but...it’s working? She can feel the lock loosen and soon...she’s free? The handcuffs fall to the floor! The kids cheer wildly for this! Ernesto’s apathetic tying of everything not made of metal comes back to bite him in the butt as she uses her now-free hands to pick at the ropes around of her legs! Soon, they come free! She shimmies her shoulders and frees herself of the rope around her shoulders! Finally, she stands up, moves the bandana around her mouth down to around her neck and spits out the other bandana.

“Ta-dah!” A victorious Sam exclaimed. The crowd erupted with cheers. At that moment, Ernesto walked in, holding a plate of chicken tenders.

“Hey guys. Let me guess, she didn’t es-what the Helioptile?!” Ernesto exclaimed, nearly choking on his food at the sight of a free Sam. “How did you escape the cuffs? The key was in your boot!”
“And they still are.” Sam said haughtily as she pulled the key out of her boot.
"Then how did you get free without the key?!" Ernesto demanded to know.
"Sorry, but a good magician never reveals her secrets" Sam said with a smirk. "And now, it's time to hold up your end of the deal." Sam reminded him, causing the kids in the audience to turn towards the singer.

Ernesto started sweating like a sinner in church. "Um...here's the thing. You see, the candy.. is in my car, yea. Let me go get it" he said nervously before slowly backing away and then running out of the banquet hall.

Emily walked up to Sam and whispered, "he's not coming back, is he?"
"Nope," Sam whispered back before going on the mic to say, "hey kids! Ernesto told me earlier that the first person to get the chocolate bar out of his pocket gets extra candy!" The kids screamed with excitement as they got up and chased down the singer.

As the sounds of Ernesto's shrieks of terror could be heard, Mary walked up to Sam and asked, "so, how did you escape without using the key?"
"You see," Sam explained, "Ernesto should have never let Emily give me that pep talk, because it gave her the chance to slip me this." Sam pulled the object that saved her career: a bobby pin.
"Oh, so you picked the lock, huh?"
"Yep. I have such a supportive friend." Sam said as she placed an arm around her bff. "But I have a question for you: where did Eric the handcuffs?"
"Oh. You see, Eric really wanted to give you a challenge. So, he asked me to buy them as one of his birthday gifts." she sheepfully admitted.
Sam laughed and stated, "Huh. Next time, get him a puppy. So, how did you like the performance?"
"I adored it! Could I trouble you to perform some more after I round up all those kids?"
"I don't know..."
"I'll give you $20 more than what we originally talked about."
"Deal."

The end.

[Solarbeast]

Great story with an interesting twist from the singer Andy he stolen business idea. I’m now wondering how many othe acts has the amazing Wanda put out of business and how many of those would try something similar to what we just read?

[Deleted User 769]

Great story with an interesting twist from the singer Andy he stolen business idea. I’m now wondering how many othe acts has the amazing Wanda put out of business and how many of those would try something similar to what we just read?

Villains to the left of me, angry Birthday clowns to the right,..

[TamatoaShiny123]

Great story with an interesting twist from the singer Andy he stolen business idea. I’m now wondering how many othe acts has the amazing Wanda put out of business and how many of those would try something similar to what we just read?

Villains to the left of me, angry Birthday clowns to the right,..

Lol