Kinktober: Batgirl Auctioned Off (M+F+/F)

[TamatoaShiny123]

“Ladies and gentlemen!” the Clown Prince of Crime, The Joker, spoke into a microphone. “Welcome to the auction of a lifetime!”

Practically every villain in Gotham City had gathered in one of the many abandoned warehouses the city had to offer to participate in an auction where Joker, dressed in a black suit and tie for the occasion, promised that the proceeds would go to a “very special charity’ (i.e. his wallet).

“Come on, Joker!” The Penguin cried out. “Let’s get this thing started already!”
“You’ve been building up what this ‘mystery item’ is for the past hour!” The Riddler exclaimed.

Joker shushed the both of them. “Easy there, fellas. But you’re right, I suppose. It’s time to reveal what you’re bidding for. Harley, pull back the curtain!”
“Yes, Mister J!”

Harley pulled the curtain behind her boyfriend back, revealing what the item was: Batgirl strapped to an electric chair with a purple ballgag shoved in her mouth. The straps went around her wrists, elbow, stomach, lap, and ankles. Everyone oohed and aahed upon seeing their nemesis all bound up.

Joker brought attention to the switch that was connected to the electric chair. “Señors y señoras, you’ll be fighting over who has the distinct honor of pulling the switch that’ll light up Batgirl’s life! Now, let’s start the bidding at $100,000. Do I hear a hundred grand?”

The Mad Hatter raised his hand. “I’ll take that price.”
“$125,000!” Firefly called out.
“$250,000!” Riddler exclaimed.

The Maestro of Villainy, Music Meister, suddenly climbed up onto his chair and sang into his microphone. ”$525,600!”

Riddler growled. “Ah, sit down, Glee Club. Why are you even here?”
“Simple: to settle the score with Batgirl!”
“Wait, wasn’t it Batman who thwarted your world domination plan?” Firefly asked.

Penguin laughed. “Oh yea, I remember that. Didn’t Bat-jerk thwart you with some auto-tune device?”

Everyone began laughing at the corrupt conductor (“It’s funny ‘cuz he sucks!” Meister heard Killer Croc shout). Furious, the wicked warbler started to sing into his microphone with the intent of hypnotizing everyone in the warehouse with his hypnotic voice.

”Listen well, you ignorant fools! My powers rock! The rest of you drool! You’ll pool your cash and give it to me! For pulling the switch would fill me with glee! And then-aack!”

While he had successfully hypnotized a few people in the warehouse, his voice apparently didn’t successfully ensnare Mister Freeze in time, for the malicious musician’s face was met was with a blast from his freeze gun. Suffering from a sudden onset of frostbite, Music Meister collapsed onto the floor.

Joker blinked and rubbed his head, recovering from the trance he was put in. “Freeze, what happened?”
“Let’s just say I encouraged our singing pal to...chill out,” the frosty villain responded in a monotone voice.

Everyone sat in silence (except from a snicker from Killer Croc) before the auctioneer (upcoming pun fully intended) broke the ice. “Well then...now that that musical interlude is through, let’s resume the bidding.”

Harley’s eyes suddenly widened. “Uh, Mister J-“
“What, Harley?! Can’t you see I’m holding an auction here?!”
“She’s gone!”
“What are you-what the hell?!”

Somehow, in all of the chaos, Batgirl managed to free herself from the chair and was gone! The Riddler pointed up to a newly-formed hole in the roof that Batgirl presumably created and climbed out of.

“Now that’s cold,” Mister Freeze stated.