The (Many) Perils of Nitro Girl (F/F)

[Stiletto Amore]

Ah, the venerable Nitro Girl. We meet at last”


Dressed in her figure hugging silver catsuit the curvy crime fighter dropped the (top) secret files she’d been examining and slowly turned around, her arms raised in surrender.

Between Nitro Girl and the office door was Gen zee, a smirking young woman in a school girl outfit, her employer, the impossibly glamorous, ageing crime boss Lady Windermere, and a pair of twins in matching black and white striped jerseys.


“No doubt, the pleasure is all yours” Nitro Girl said wryly.

She had been careless and now she’d been caught bang to rights snooping around a Superviliians lair - there was no sense making an unpleasant scene. Better to bide her time, and pull out the Ace when the opportunity presented itself.


“Wrap her up boys!” Ordered the femme fatale in the ruby red dress.

Nitro Girl didn’t resist as her hands were quickly pulled behind her and firmly tied - after all, this was very much par of the course for her investigations.


“I say we fit her for a concrete overcoat and send her Mother some flowers!” The young woman in the straw boater demanded, no doubt still seething after Nitro Girl had trussed her up in an earlier adventure.


“Now, now Gen, I’m sure that won’t be necessary” Lady Windermere purred, her slender fingers clutching a well polished service revolver “especially when our guest is being so, cooperative,..”


Nitro Girl raised a suggestive eyebrow in response.


“Nevertheless, I think it would be better if we continued this conversation in a more, salubrious setting. Naturally, you’ll accompany us?” She said, addressing her captive.


“Naturally” Nitro Girl replied, her tone one of light amusement.

This was emphatically not her first rodeo.


“Excellent. I do so prefer a harmonious workplace. Speaking of which,..”

She nodded at one of her goons who swiftly tied a red silk scarf over the bottom half of the caped crime fighter's face.


“There. That’s much better”

Silently, Nitro Girl stared daggers over her gag.


“Belle, Sebastian - take her away!”

Now firmly a prisoner the caped crusader was quickly ushered from the scene through the office door.


“And Cut!”



‘How did it come to this,’ I grumbled as I pulled down my stage gag ‘First in my class at RADA, five years at the Royal Shakespeare Company, a star of stage and screen for over fifteen years and now look at me - reduced to dressing like a rotisserie chicken on some tawdy kids TV show”


The cast and crew knew better than to respond when I was in this kind of mood, and busied themselves by checking their equipment for the hundredth time that morning, or simply staring at their shoes.

It’s fair to say, on days like today, I was something of a plus sized diva - or a double XXL Mariah Carey.


For those who have yet to have the pleasure, my name is Pippa Lavene and for the last twelve months I’ve been the somewhat reluctant star of the kids adventure serial The (Many) Perils Of Nitro Girl.


With an insanely catchy theme song, outlandish costumes, clumsy fight sequences, clipped dialogue and frequent use of cliffhangers it was like a (bad) comic book brought to life.

That said, there was something about it’s arch, uncynical tone that made it an unlikely ratings hit for CBBC and ensured that a steady stream of some of the biggest names in British TV were queuing up to appear on the show.

As for myself, despite an unconvincing blue wig and a skin tight silver costume that seemed to accentuate every square inch of fat on my body (of which there was plenty) I had long ago decided to play the campy action entirely straight, delivering every line as though it were Shakespeare.

Or, as the television critic at the Times put it “A thin-lipped, deadpan performance that is sure to delight the children and amuse the parents in equal measure” Radio Times. (Not that I’m bragging of course!)


I held out the red scarf which had previously served as my 'gag' and watched as it was swiftly replaced with a bottle of water.

It was lukewarm, and thus undrinkable.

I cast it aside, with something approaching disdain, soaking my long suffering assistant in the process.


“My Dear you were fabulous - as always!” The Director boomed as he stepped out from behind the camera, patting me on the shoulder.


“Yeah, thanks” I muttered distractedly as the beleaguered make-up lady reapplied my lip-gloss.


“Really quite wonderful!”


“Yes, you mentioned”


“Right. Yes. It’s just that I noticed that, in one of the shots, we could see that Nitro Girls hands weren’t really tied-”


“And?”


“Ah, yes, well, I was just thinking,..”


“Always dangerous, but go on,..”


“I was, that is, we were thinking, maybe we could reshoot the scene-”


“Oh, I don’t really think that will be necessary, do you?!” I replied, eager to wrap up filming before lunch.


The implausibly young Director paused for a moment, as though he were giving serious consideration to causing a scene.

Eventually sanity prevailed and reason returned to it’s throne.


“I suppose not” He grumbled disconsolately,..



An hour and a half later, and following a rather expansive dinner, I was back in costume being shown around a rather cavernous film set that had been set up to resemble an old saw mill.

In the centre of the staging area was a long conveyor belt with a large, circular saw attached at one end.

Well, it didn’t take a genius to work out my part in this tableau,..

“The damsel in distress menaced by a giant buzz saw, it's a little hack, don’t you think?” I said dismissively as I fingered the teeth of the plastic blade.


“I prefer to think of it as ‘classic’” The Director replied, sounding somewhat hurt.


“Whatever” I said huffily “Let’s get this over with shall we!”

I hoped up onto the conveyor belt as the actors playing the part of my various captors shuffled in place waiting for their cue.


“Okay, places people. Now, in this scene, Nitro Girl is being placed into Lady Windermers’s inescapable death trap-”


Out of the corner of my eye I spied a sweaty teenager nervously clutching a bright red scarf and some white cotton clothesline.


“And just what do you think you’re going to be doing with those?” I asked, in a vaguely threatening manner.


“Erm- it’s just, well,.. according to the script-” She stammered, her eyes darting around the set in search of the nearest exit, or possibly a hole to crawl into.


“Yes?”


“Well, Nitro Girl is tied to the conveyor belt,..”


“Of course She is,” I said rolling my eyes “Because our script editor is a pervert with ropes on the brain”


“That’s as maybe,” The Director conceded, “But the fact remains, it is in the script”


“Fine, give them here!” I snapped, impatiently snatching the tying materials out of my assistants hand.


Working quickly, I took one of the coils of rope and tied my feet together in a loose knot.


“Do,.. do you want me to help?” The young woman stammered anxiously.


“That won’t be necessary!” I assured her as I sulkily tied the bandanna over the lower half of my face and placed my hands behind my back.


“There. Happy now?!” I spat defiantly, daring someone to voice an objection.


The crestfallen stagehand glanced at the Director, who looked equally distraught.

There was a long, uncomfortable silence.


“But Pippa darling, I’m just not sure the viewers will be fooled into thinking Nitro Girl is really helpless unless we can actually see her restraints” He pointed out, lamely.


“I’m sorry, are you really suggesting that I can’t act ‘tied up’?” I demanded.


“No, no, of course not” He replied, suddenly sounding more than a little flustered.


“Right. That’s settled then” I said, stretching my, rather ample frame along the conveyor belt so I was roughly in line with the saw blade. “Let’s get rolling!”


“Do you mind if I might make a suggestion?”

Everyone looked around in an effort to identify the poor soul who had dared to speak truth to (my absolute) power.

It was Alice Scott, an elderly stage actress of some renown who was guesting as the Evil Lady Windermere.

Of all the cast members present on the shoot, I tolerated Alice the most.

“Go ahead”


“Forgive me, but it isn’t a question of your acting ability, but rather the ‘expectations’ of the audience”


“How do you mean?” I asked, suitably intrigued.


“Well, have you ever noticed how many times Nitro Girl is tied up in the course of her adventures?” She asked pointedly.


As a matter of fact I had. In fact, by my count I’d been trussed up, bound and gagged in almost every episode of the series - so much so that scenes of bondage had quickly become an unofficial motif for the show.


“Well, it’s fairly typical of this type of show isn’t it?” I replied “Besides, the kids love the cliffhanger ending to the episodes”


“No doubt. But I’m just suggesting that maybe your writers are also acutely aware of the innate appeal of a buxom heroine in bondage to the Dad’s watching”


In truth, I had long suspected this was probably true.

After all, I’d seen some of the fan letters Nitro Girl gets sent each week.

I smiled, despite myself.


“Okay, I’ll bite. What’s your point?”


“Only that, maybe this time we give the people what they want”


“Which is?” I asked, suddenly interested.


“You,.. trussed up like a thanksgiving turkey”


“Excuse me!” I shrieked with uncomfortable laughter.


“Oh, come on Pippa, don’t be so coy. I bet over half our audience are sexually frustrated parents who are only watching with their kids because they get a little turned on at the sight of you writhing around in poorly applied ropes”


“Haha! Well, that’s as maybe..” I said blushing, despite myself “But what do you suggest I do about it?”


“Well, how about we really give them something to drool over”


“You mean tie me up for real?” I asked, not entirely horrified at the prospect.


“Why not? It would make the whole thing a lot more exciting for everyone - the parents will secretly love it and the children will tune in to see how you escape..”


“Hmm, okay” I said, feigning reluctance “you’ve convinced me. Go ahead and tie me up”


There was a collective intake of breath from everyone on set.

Then, as if by magic, the crew sprang into action, as though they were afraid I would suddenly change my mind.


A coil of red rope was hurriedly produced from the prop cupboard, which Alice proceeded to cut into shorter lengths.


“Okay Pippa, now even though the camera can’t see your arms behind your back, I think it will be much more effective if your hands are tied”


“You’re the expert” I said, as Alice guided my arms behind my back, causing my, rather ample chest to strain against the skin tight silver bodysuit.


A strange hush had descended on the set and I was suddenly aware that everyone was trying (and failing) not to be caught staring at my cleavage.


“See” Alice whispered as she fastened my hands behind my back “Every man on the crew, and,.. several of the women, can’t seem to take their eyes of you”


“Well, it’s certainly helping with my posture” I replied as the cord was pulled tight.


“Okay honey, now the legs”.


Alice repeated the process on my ankles, firmly knotting them together with a flurry of complicated knots.


When I finally looked up I saw a ring of hungry eyes were fixed on the two of us.

“Hmm, maybe you’re on to something,..” I whispered back.


“I can go one better,.. If you like” She teased.


“I’m game if you are,” I replied happily.


This time Alice wound several lengths of rope around my arms, seeming to take great care to ensure that the red cord drew yet more attention to my chest area.

“How’s that?” She asked as she completed the final knot.


“It’s a trifle snug,” I said, glancing at our audience, “but they don’t seem to mind”


“Quite the contrary” Alice remarked with a droll.


“Now, this gag might be a little different to the one’s you’re used to” She explained as she neatly folded a bright red bandanna into a thick band.


“Go ahead. I trust you” I said, meaning it.


“Okay, you asked for it. Open up”


I did as I was told allowing Alice to fit the cloth between my teeth.

This was unexpected, but far from actually unpleasent.


“Ready?” She asked


“As I’ll ever be” I replied as she pulled the scarf taunt and tied it firmly at the back of my head.


After a final tug on my ropes for good measure Alice stepped back to admire her handiwork.


It was impossible to deny that her plan had worked to perfection, indeed, almost every member of the cast and crew were practically drooling at the sight of me, all tied up.

If this trend was repeated across the country, we could be looking at record viewing figures and that meant an improved contract.


On second thoughts, maybe playing the hero on a kids adventure show wasn’t so bad after all,..

[Reidy]

Nice story. I can already imagine how much I'd get a kick from watching Nitro Girl.

[Dpsiic]

Terrific story, if only all film and TV producers read this and stopped tying the heroines in loosies we would all be happy

[Reidy]

Terrific story, if only all film and TV producers read this and stopped tying the heroines in loosies we would all be happy

Exactly. So many stunning ladies in the Arrow verse, get them all trussed up properly for several episodes at a time.

[Hojojutsutengu]

Another excellent story and I would totally watch this. Haha would do much better than correct Arrowverse type shows

[Bandit666]

What a great and lighthearted story, I do hope Nitro Girl makes another appearance some time soon. Or as they used to say.

Stay tuned. For more adventures of Nitro Girl at the same time. On the same Nitro channel next week..........

[Stiletto Amore]

Nice story. I can already imagine how much I'd get a kick from watching Nitro Girl.

So glad you liked it! I'm sure Pippa would be overjoyed to hear that you enjoyed 'her' show

[Stiletto Amore]

Terrific story, if only all film and TV producers read this and stopped tying the heroines in loosies we would all be happy

Haha! That's very kind - thank you

[Stiletto Amore]

Terrific story, if only all film and TV producers read this and stopped tying the heroines in loosies we would all be happy

Exactly. So many stunning ladies in the Arrow verse, get them all trussed up properly for several episodes at a time.

Haha! Unfortunately the DC office are refusing to return my calls

[Stiletto Amore]

What a great and lighthearted story, I do hope Nitro Girl makes another appearance some time soon. Or as they used to say.

Stay tuned. For more adventures of Nitro Girl at the same time. On the same Nitro channel next week..........

Haha! Thank you so much! I'm delighted to hear that you enjoyed the story.

Hmm, I'm sure Nitro Girl can be persuaded to return for another adventure at some point in the future,..

[Dpsiic]

Looking forward to Nitro girl’s return