Just Hanging Around
The garbled words as George unbuckled James's ankles and Aiden and Jamie helped him to his feet sounded even more desperate than they sounded angry but, let's face it: appealing to their better natures was pointless. As far as anyone dissing the Scouts was concerned, they didn't have one better nature between the three of them. Scott expressed his disappointment that he wasn't going to "get a go" with the slanderer and Harry seemed to agree with him.
"Sorry, boys; too many cooks."
"Yes, don't worry, we'll enjoy ourselves for you."
"Yeah, we'll just have to give him extra for you." At that stage James couldn't even imagine what "extra" might entail.
George had scouted the immediate site for a suitable location and everyone (except James) agreed to try the fence-post near the gate to the bailey surrounding the keep. James adopted the "let's see if they'll take things easy on me if I cooperate" approach. He knew he had no chance of escaping but really didn't want to find out what Aiden meant by "extra".
As the "execution party" got to within a few metres of the fence-post, Jamie spotted the snag. "Can't we find somewhere else? He could use his feet on the wire or even on the bars of the gate."
"You're right. Now where?"
"How about over there?" George indicated an oak tree towards the pond.
Scott wasn't pleased. "Oh come on, you guys, I'm not going to be able to see him from here." Harry would have echoed the sentiments but, you know what I said about those in charge not having a better nature?
"That's OK. You'll probably still be able to hear him." James didn't think George was even remotely funny.
James and his escort disappeared from both Scott's and Harry's sight behind the castle masonry and James's breathing became more laboured once he'd caught sight of the stump. Someone had obviously tidied up the remains of where a substantial branch had to be removed from the ancient tree leaving a prominent upward pointing stub about forty centimetres long and about eight thick. The tip must have been about a metre and a half from the ground. Excellent! Even though no one had ever done it to him previously, James knew that the next few minutes were going to be uncomfortable if he was lucky.
Jamie forced his Champion to back up against the stub and asked him if he was ready. James took a deep breath.
"Hang on, just a little check." George undid the drawstring of James's Speedos, pulled it tight and tied it off very securely indeed on the grounds that, "He wouldn't want to slip off, would he?" James did try a final plea but, upon having it turned down, he resorted to mangled abuse once more. "That's better. I wondered where the real James Hill was."
When I said back there that James had his appeal turned down, it wasn't exactly explicit but was certainly implicit in the actions of his tormentors as Jamie and Aiden lifted the newly struggling blonde off the ground and George hooked the back of his swimming costume over the stub. "OK, lower away."
Isn't it convenient how the human body balances like that? Poor James hung in the wedgie frantically thrashing his feet around and gradually moderating his language to pleading once more.
"Can you understand him?"
"I think he's saying, 'Thank you for the Speedos.'"
"Yes, could be. He'd've settled down lower in those boxers of his."
"They might even have torn."
"Yes, how thoughtful of us not to let him fall."
James continued to plead with hardly any swearing at all and so George decided to take pity on him - sort of. He took Aiden's ever-ready penknife and carefully slit the drawstring just beside the knot he had recently so carefully tied.
The squeal, as the garish garment stretched and the wearer came to a sudden halt with his feet still clear of the ground, effectively covered the sound of nylon threads splitting. James continued pleading (as far as the Scouts could tell) until Jamie thought he'd had enough. He could simply have cut the stretched gusset of James's briefs but he did think that, with more torments to come, even his Champion had been tormented sufficiently in his current situation and called Aiden to help him take the struggling boy down. They lifted and George unhooked the rapidly disintegrating garment which did very little to conform to its original form.
James was marched back to the keep while he tried to hold the multi-coloured wreckage in place behind him although it wasn't actually much use in preserving what was left of his dignity. Jamie asked if he needed to visit the low-hanging branch to tend to himself and change. "Yeff, pweeve."
"Since you asked so nicely, we'll even leave you in privacy." Jamie gathered up another of James's identical pairs of loose white boxers and some of that soothing lotion that he'd had the shrewd idea might come in useful before the end of the weekend. He stuffed some useful items into his duffel bag and took James by his firmly bound, and increasingly uncomfortable arms. He declined the help of his companions and I think he wanted to take advantage of the opportunity of a word with his Champion in private. What he said will probably never be known but it was remarked upon for some time afterwards, even but adults, how James seemed to have changed in school; he was less cocky, nowhere near as mouthy and he even worked harder. He was even seen to give precedence to other people's needs over his own wants. I suppose that, being a Scout, Jamie had simply done his good deed for the day.
Jamie soon allowed James to walk unassisted to the facilities and the blonde could be seen nodding and heard trying to communicate until they were out of earshot. Once at their destination, Jamie made James kneel while he padlocked one end of the chain round his right ankle and, after a careful inspection, threaded his boxers onto the chain before attaching the other end to a branch leading from the main bough. It was far too twiggy for James to be able to slip the chain free.
Jamie told James to try to keep still while he untied his arms and wrists. Still is one thing: quiet was another as James felt the circulation returning to his tortured arms. "OK?"
James nodded and Jamie worked on his wrists. A newly freed James spent quite some time rotating his shoulders and rubbing his rope marks before getting down to the matter in hand. Jamie waited. "Eyowa fai' I coulve fanve in pfry-vu'."
"It's OK, I'm going to leave you to it for about ten minutes, that should give you a chance to change and do anything else you might need to do." James looked at his mop-headed Owner, trying to spot the snag. "Oh, if you want me to be out of sight, there's just one more thing." James knew it, there had to be one. "You'll have to remove your gag." Surely that couldn't be it. "Go on, just pull it out and give it here." James was still suspicious as he did what he was told.
Jamie stowed the stick and its binding into his bag and withdrew a referee's whistle. "Open." James bit down on the "Acme Thunderer" and knelt awaiting further instructions. "Once I've got up, you can take it out if you want to but, if I don't hear it blow every thirty seconds, the pain of that wedgie will be like eating ice-cream compared to what happens next. Got it?"
"Rrhh – rrhh." James nodded.
"Ten minutes, understand?" another whistle confirmed James's understanding.
By the time Jamie had returned to the other four boys, Harry and Scott had been untied but Harry still had the padlock in the strap round his ankles whereas George didn't think that was necessary for Scott. Harry had been allowed to remove his gag and, being Harry, he immediately demanded that Scot be padlocked as well because Scott owed him a penalty and it would have been no skin of the noses of the other boys if he escaped.
"Harry, this is Scott you're talking about." George knew his protest was silly.
"Nah, fair's fair, lads: sauce for the Sailor sauce for the Farmer."
"He's right, George. Just lock him up for a while." Scott made no resistance.
The council needed to come to a decision. They even thought Scott and Harry should be allowed to contribute. The situation was as follows:
• James had paid for dissing the Scouts but Harry demanded revenge for the disrespect to the Sea Scouts as well.
• That reminded the Scouts that Harry also had to suffer for his remarks about Farmer Boys. He'd hoped they'd forgotten about that.
• Harry needed to pay his forfeit for losing the scavenger hunt. That could be interesting; either they all got a fresh fish supper or Harry could look forward to unimaginable torments (unimaginable, that is, to anyone who wasn't in the Scouts)
• Scott had to pay for losing the private bet with Harry.
All the above entertainments were in addition to the main event: Jamie had lost the bet with Aiden. He would have to suffer - so would his useless Champion. It looked as if the event was going to last into a third day. What a good job they'd brought a lot of food. There was even that tap that was used to fill the cattle trough in the field just the other side of the Light Water Gutter.
It was getting on towards dinner time so the obvious first to pay his forfeit should be Harry; then, if he got it wrong there would be plenty of time to torment him after a rather lesser dinner than if he was as good as his word.
Jamie went to collect James and George adjusted the fire.